Sunday, January 29, 2012

Pre-Marital

So I'm not sure we were properly warned about pre-marital counseling... Or maybe I was so certain our engaged bliss would continue through the wedding that I ignored it?

Anyways, we began premarital counseling 2 weeks ago with Sojourn,  our church here in Louisville.  Sojourn does something so powerful: instead of us meeting with the pastor for the  5 or 6 sessions, we are matched up with a married couple from the church that they have trained up to counsel us.  We meet in their home one night a week for 6-8 weeks.

We were matched with Josh and Beth.  They are 30ish (but look our age), have 3 girls that are post-card-adorable,  a gorgeous homey and inviting house and really are just perfect.  I take that back, they are a family committed to serving Jesus and the beauty of the gospel seems to propel their family.  It has been such a blessing to have them invite us into their home these past 2 weeks.  They are able to put meat and flesh on the scenarios and hypothetical circumstances talked about.  Beth is able to speak to me on what my role as a Godly wife is and Josh is able to speak to Chris about what it's like to be a husband after God's own heart.  And we believe them because of how it seems to have worked for their family.

HOWEVER, no matter how much of a blessing Josh and Beth are, pre-marital is tough.  It's forced Chris and I to see where our assumptions differ, how selfish and sinful we are, the weight of how serious joining ourselves in marriage is and lastly, it's forced us to learn to communicate on a hard level.

I don't care how hard we tried to have deep and meaningful conversations before now, it is almost impossible to do on our own.  But with Beth and Josh asking questions like, "Jenny, what do you think it looks like to submit to Christ" and with subjects like money, roles and responsibilities being brought up, it's impossible for us to not have serious conversations.  Thanks be to God every icky conversation we've had have all ended wonderfully with each of us clinging to Jesus more and more.   I really think that is due to the fact that Chris seeks out Jesus and I think really does fully feel the serious weight of the colossal task he has in leading our family.  I'm not sure I could be with a man that better humbles himself before the Lord to seek direction.  The beauty of Chris is that when I point out things he does that hurts me, he immediately takes it to the Lord and seeks change.  Now this is not boldly apparent.  Instead it's painfully subtle.  Usually I'll be thinking he's upset with me because he's so quiet when in reality he's just seeking counsel from the Lord.

So, we're only on week 2, and tomorrow is week 3.  We have a lot more territory to cover so I am sure we have a lot more icky conversations to have, but my prayer is that through each of them, that I point Chris to Christ and that I cling to Jesus as my Savior and ultimate answer.  I have to remind myself that as beautiful and wonderful as this marriage looks like it's going to be, it's a blink of the eye when compared to the eternity I'll spend with Jesus in the Kingdom....

Happy Sunday everyone! Hope your weekend was fun!

XO

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